The Classic Case of Mysterious Encounters....

Beloved Howard,

For the nth time in my not so uneventful life....I had an extremely unfathomable experience.....its not even percievable by anyone....like not even the Freudians of the world or even the Rand followers cannot predict....
JEEEESUUUUSSSS CHRIST!!!
Its was an experience worth mentioning in the hall of encounters....
Guess who I came across??....
MEEEEEE!!...yes...as infinitely impossible as it may seem....the encounter was indeed with a man as well...flambouyant, and so many other things as me....looked exactly like me...and picked up a cigarette in the same manner as I do......of course even his reason for lighting up was seemingly the same as mine....
He seemed to understand the need to do something not because he wanted to do it...he probably hates conforming to the standards of regular smokers.....but just happened to notice the expectant stares in his vicious vicnity(namely Me)...and lit up for the mundane reason of complying......actuallyt more like obliging.....and directing the vicious stares in other directions...
It definitely worked with souls not exactly aware of the procedure...but got me to stare harder...coz I was just sooo damn CURIOUS!!!!.....and btw...remind me to ask for hash from the sadhus in Rishikesh next time I go.....
anyhow...the experience is over and as am i.....
"the knows reasons that reson cannot understand"....whoever said that was obviously stoned outta his testicles...

goodnight Howard
urs over it

Choleric

The Insectivore Carnival...

Beloved Howard,
Today, just as yesterday, was an extraordinary day in the ever so extraordinary life of ME, ME, ME....not apologising for being self consumed..
So my dear Howard, the ascension of a new species of insects has been prophesised for nearly a year now.....and after a loooong loooong HARD wait...the ascension has come through....the insectiovorous insect has finally broken out of his winged shell..n yeah im guessing that he's missing out on so much now.......but he's seeing the world through my eyes...n u know how unique and quite modestly fortunate that is my beloved...
The insectivore in question is the accomplice i was referring to in a previous letter...who's fall was very orantely obvious....but somehow...my love....this was completely untrue and he emerged as someone completely new....as the Insectvore....
And my turf is now adorned by his presence on the equally arbit throne, as we sit every dusk, of course not till dawn, and observe mortal subjects...
The insectivore inspires in me a new reason for existence, a new feathered mask I want to fluff up against my "layer" of dry skin, and a new wardrobe to appease my limerick fantasies...
He construes me for exactly what I am, whihc can of course be quite disconcerting for someone as predictable as me...n definitely very very sad that this person completely knows the reason behind EVRYTHING i do....of course one thing the insect does not have is my sense of discerning a person, a situation or even a subconsciouss...
He still has a lot to learn...but yes...this is a formal announcement of his arrival..on the scene....the INSECTIVORE has arrived Howard...n he's definitely here to last...laughoutloudshrillandclearohsoloudmydear.......

goodnight Love
urs in infestation

Choleric

And The Joey also falls..

Beloved Howard,
Today, as in the spirit of the declarations made previously...I have snapped another weight down my pants...n I have in aprallel dimension....sorta regained some lost soul mass....so to say...my soul/mass index is now much higher than them lesser mortals again...
SIGHHHH......now that thats done...and the road to redemption seems relatively easy yet again....I am up for another sin....
But let us pray(lowpitchmoan).....and recall all that we are thankful for...Shall we Roxie??..
"The name on Cholera Boy's lips was always...
Joey..
The baby rakin in ma dibs was always
Joey...
He said(quietlywhisperedtonobodyinparticular)..
'Ur Gonna be a celebrity..
That menas somebody everyone knows...
They're gonna recognize ur cuffs, ur capes, ur jeans, ur ties, ur throws....'

From just some dumb Bengali's wife he came to be..
Joey....
Who said that sulkin's not an art??...
And who in sase had stuck it out....
They'd say has got a fabulous pout......
JOOOOOEYYYY's (fragile) Heart!!!"
Bows to applause and exits..and waits for Choleric to escape the ewwwww so creepy clutches of poetry.....and return to the B_E_A_utiful lust of the prose....
You know wat they say right?......The SEX is in the heel.......
Goodnight Howard
urs outta bondage

Choleric

All outta Love...

Beloved Howard,
The breathlessness has settled and I can see clearly now......my heart rate has resumed its original uneven quickstep and my pulse has resigned to the old ways of unpredictability.....even my sweat glands have resumed their arbit vague vanity....
I can see clearly now, because I was made to see it through the haze of the millionth smokaccino, through the haze of many many more tasksnottastes at hand......through the slow murmur of the "whispered nothings"...and through the carelessness of a scent that refuses to leave....this one even more Satanic than the last intimate one...
I can see clearly now, for I was, against popular opinion told so by a much simpler smile.....a much more reasoned answer, and a much more concerned action....to not complicate my life than it already is...and for once..it made sense to me.....narcissism gets the best outta me....
Everything has been drawn into something less than a toenail and something more than a hair...struggling against the throat muscles to be let out...scratching against raw unprotected and unexposed flesh....
Things are clearer because I am not allowing myself this one discretion this one time.....the original sin at the cost of the eternal sin....
The world is spinning on its longitudes again and is flat again....it doesnt need to be a sphere anymore......it doesnot require to spin evenly on any axis...
I am Howard.....much to my own surpirise....this time not the cause for my heartbreak....
And while it may seem inexplicable on my part....this is one time...I refuse to share....

Goodnight My Lover
Urs in mourning

Choleric....not so sexy anymore...

Breathing Disorders...

Beloved Howard,
"I know this is gonna sound really stupid,...but i really wanna kiss you right now.."
Ok, so that was perhaps not the best opening line to a conversation....
How are you doing Howard?....My life has been...well....suffice it to say....quite a mouthful....
Infact, if there were any more theatrics in my life rite now.....id perhaps make the cut for the oh-so-hyped oscars....not that i have anything against them....NO SIR....
So yeah u can totally call me a distasteful fool...and a SUCKER for romance....but for once in my life...conforming to my own not so genuine beliefs....Im gonna swallow it down and say "Sure.."
Let's evalute the recent events...
Besides the Princess reclaiming some of the old lost charm, and the Shakes his Belly like a bowlful of Jelly guy finally fiding his calling, The Freudian completely foegetting about me, the Demon Hairdresser from Snake Garden finally confronting her fears, the Wicked stepsisters finally taking a backseat, the Insectivore remaining in denial as i think is his destiny and finally Krishna admitting Love.....there has still been a lot more in MY OWN life...
Remember the Trick??....yeah the one to very smartly exit and reenter without coveting a fair apology...yeah the one who brought me face to face with HIV.....and oh-so many things Ive already sang upon....
OKAY...now i know for a fact that this will my Darling Howard....knock the wind out of ur lungs....and i hope ur head....
I have as always been destined to act out as the "Other Man"....and in this scenario I am yet again...the man with the mission...the mission being what exactly.....nobody is particualrly aware......not even the ones to assign the Titles....oh how I wish I were just a mere Lord...those titles would be much easier to handle.....but a MISSION???....me?????
okay so wats in it for me??.....Krishna quite laid it out flat for me....im the one into it...n im the one whos gonna "get hurt real bad".....n im the one it just for the pure emotion....
well i was quite prompt in pointing out, as i just did for u....that im a sucker for romance....CHEAP, CLICHED, UNORIGINAL, UNTHOUGHTOF, and it doesnt have to be a grocerylist of encounters....no...it will suffice if its just a lil peck, a scrape, a grasp, a yell, a moan, a flower, and of course a wooden pendant....u know how im a sucker for wood!!!!!!!........laughoutloudandclearshrillandsheerrightnowrighthere.......
"These Boots are Made for Walking
Thats just wat theyll do..
One of these days boots are gonna walk all over you....."......Nancy Sinatra was perhaps thinking of Me(philofthefuture).......and the cumulative shoe...when she thought up that song...
ofcourse while singing it....i hope it was me in drag.....
well thats enough for me.....
ill let you finish it Howard....tell me...howz the underworld treatin ya????....ill furnish u with more of them "IT" words next time.....luuuuurrrve..

Goodnight then Howard
urs in Boots
Choleric

The Sam rises on the WestCoast..

Beloved Howard,



All is well....well, not really but isn't that how we're suppoosed to start a letter??....at least one filled with words of endearment...
Just so you know, in the afterlife, FYI and BTW are the new things around town...
FYI= Frequently Yodeled Inspiration, and BTW= Bretheren To Worship....
So FYI, guess whos back in town...n guess who loves to sing apologies..n guess whos stupid enough to fall for the same ol crap all over again.......yep.....you got most of that right....n THIS BTW is the aftereffect of an ignored message for a date....
So trust me..well don't coz I'm stupid....lemme express it however......i AM not gonna eat anymore of THIS particular letch's crap anymore....This person can return to their not-even-close-to-the-way-I-look "...life lasting ""love""...".......yeahwatever......
Well anyways, till the time that i get over it......you'll have to very "dearly" convince me that i can do better than that...and that im worth a lot more....

The only thing that would perhaps bring me out would be my tie.....just one of those objects that does somehting to u...in its mere existence......a recall to all gifts unknown and unexpected....on a wholly unsuspecting casual day, in times when gifts are least expected as reasons are short.....

However, im sure ur empathies with me onthis are zilch, nothing, nada, non, uns, ZEROOOO.....oh sometimes u make me regret the very day i started writing these letters to u.....if it wasn't for u Howard...id probably be locked up in a facility.....and of course my Pink Tie...the mother gift of all gifts....the gift that will one dya change my life......only the neither the gift nor my life know that..

But you do Howard..so instead of wasting my time here....I should actully go and work on chinging my life......as demonic as that may sound to u...and as mortal as it may aound to me.....its gotta be done....the bitch MUST be killed

goodnight mate

urs in vogue

Choleric

Happy??

Dearest Howard,
Happy?? New year.....
what is that supposed to mean anyways...are you telling people to Have a happy ew year..or are u askin them to??....are u just hopin they would??....well the last one makes no sense.....why would i care about other people's new year??
oh forgive me..if i sound like a hag..ive just had a long year...
yep...this has GOT to be the most eventful year of my life...just really REALLY long.....
isnt its technically SUPPOSED to feel short wen its been as eventful as mine??
well dats all i gotta say really...
may this one help me forget you
Happy New Year Howard
Goodnight Love

urs happily
Choleric