Beloved Howard,
"All fags can dance...its in our genetic makeup".....is perhaps the line all fags use on straight people...also...some lesser mortal put up a questin to me int he near chronological frame..."Why are all fags soo good looking?"......I dunno...is my answer to this the same as the reason for the former statement??....the answer I have forever held as true to my being a fag?.....Acceptance??.......the fact that straight men have to move no mountains in this world to succeed...women have to make twice of their efforts and fags three times as much...and they'll still never be really accepted...
The answer...the truth...the inevitable confrontation lay in front of my eyes as I walked a corridor full of poeple......a blur of mimatched stockings, colors, makeup, accessories, hairstles, knit and woven yet one thing in common.....a stare....a vacant inexistent stare directed by the cumulative pea-brain....
And there I was...a reflection staring back at me through the very gorrrgghgoeus curls I had so recently washed and blowdried.....n there he was....the answer staring back at me.....its coz I loathe conformity....its all perhaps ur doing Howard....but today I stand at a dead end where I must answer a certain few questions about my life if I am to move on....
Why did it happen to me?....Was it coz i used to think too much?...Was it coz I had no male friends??....Was it coz I was always overprotected by my father...who sadly due to his own insecurities has always tried to be the best he could....not realizing that he got exactly what he didnt want...a failure??.........Was it coz being a fag is all abotu fashion??.....
Exactly the point.....I am a fag.....gay....queer...homosexual.....fruitcake....without a doubt...a good one at that.....not because of any other reasons...but I just could't stand staring at girls the way everyone did...I couldn't stand passing through places and not getting noticed......I couldn't stand not making a statement....I couldnt stand not being in the limelight.....n now look Howard.....its all I have......
A case of mistaken identity, a case of forgotten interest......coz eventually we learn wat we force ourselves to learn.....only to unlearn something anyone else can.....
Yes love.....the wait is indeed about to be over....we shall meet soon.....
urs in confusion
Choleric
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